Sometimes "milestone" anniversaries are tough. November in general is a challenging month for me because it usually gets darker and cooler, and it's a natural time for life to end for many. It's been 30 years since my Daddy had to walk into that room and tell his little girls why Mommy was crying. Her Daddy had just died. I don't remember exactly what words he used, but i remember that he gently and lovingly explained in the context of our faith and the finality of a single life as we know it on this earth, that Grandpa wasn't coming back.
'He got up and went to the barn to take care of the cows, like he did every day, and had a heart attack. He died doing what he loved, caring for others. We believe that his spirit went to heaven and that we'll be reunited there someday.'
That's a lot of pressure for a young father--comforting a grieving young wife and two little girls! I don't tell this to make you sad or depressed, but rather to speak to the beauty of what my parents did for me my entire life. They kept us safe but didn't shield us from reality. Death is part of life and we became comfortable with that transition rather than fearing it. We knew there would be sad times and had experienced that recently with the death of our beloved cat Spooky. We went to funerals to pay our respects and say our "goodbyes." We learned to comfort each other in those moments and to be that support in time to remind people that life does go on, the sun does shine again, and you can still experience true and lasting joy. Through the years there have been many times i missed Grandparents or felt a little cheated for the short time I had with them, but mostly I was able to remember the special times I DID have with them. It's powerful stuff to remember specific good times with someone you love many, many years later. It's also really, really neat to feel them so strongly in your heart it's like they never really left.
So, if you're having a tough time, or you know someone else who is, please know there's someone who's been there and ready to help.Our finite minds need the polar descriptions to understand our feelings sometimes. We need those times of sadness to truly appreciate the depths of how glad we can be. So make today, and every day, a bright one!
I love your insights, and the gentle way that you look at the world. You see the world through the innocent eyes of a child, I think, and there's a wonder and a gentleness to them that makes them understandable to everyone. You sooth us. Thank you.
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